Being maternal is an instinct, but what about the instinct to control? As more alpha females emerge in American society it’s hard to determine whether women are evolving into dominant creatures or if it’s an active choice.

In nature, the alpha female is dominant in her relationship, sometimes attacking other females, and quite a few have been known to kill their mate. After looking into these rumored behaviors, I found that many of these scenarios occurred only in captivity, but who hasn’t felt like their relationship was under the microscope from time to time?

1. Praying Mantis

This aggressive insect is into sexual cannibalism; typically when the male is dismounting the female during copulation the female will then bit off his head (talk about S&M!). It’s thought that the male is willing to sacrifice himself for the sake of his offspring and the female, well she’s just hungry. This knowledge has made its way into the pop-culture canon to the point where it reached The Jersey Shore. A female praying mantis was recently quoted as saying, “If JWoww doesn’t stop associating herself with us, we’re going to rip our own heads off.”

2. Latrodectus Hesperus, AKA “Widow Spider”

Pop culture really took this one and ran with it. Apparently it is more of the exception than the rule that latrodectus spiders eat their mates after copulation. This behavior is typically limited to species in the Southern Hemisphere, but does sometimes occur in their U.S. counterparts. These spiders are solitary and the male actually needs to contact the female to mate or risk being eaten if he shows up unannounced (now there’s a lesson we could all learn from them!).

3. Honeybee

Lil’ Kim has this insect species to thank for her “Queen Bee” moniker. Bee colonies consist of a few thousand “drone” bees, male honeybees who have just one job – keep the Queen Bee preggers. Following successful fertilization of the Queen Bee, the drone dies because his penis and abdominal tissues are ripped from his body during sex (male Abercrombie models around the world wince at this thought)–because apparently, domination and emasculation simply aren’t enough for the Queen Bee.

4. Lemurs

The lemur is one of the only species of primates and mammals who exhibit female social dominance. Within the lemur group that dominance varies–male ring-tailed lemurs are submissive in all situations but male crowned lemurs only act submissively when the female acts aggressively towards them. Still, bottom line? She’s the boss.

5. Spotted or “Laughing” Hyenas

Dominance amongst hyenas isn’t about size or aggression; it’s all about social alliances – and what’s more female than that? Banding together in clans that range in size from 5 to 90 these felines are led by a single alpha female who is commonly referred to as the matriarch. The female spotted hyena is heavier than the male and calls the shots when it comes to mating, often choosing a younger male from the same clan. When it comes to courting, it’s clear who gets the last laugh.

6. Spotted Sandpiper

This plumed piper is polyandrous, meaning that the female of the species mates with more than one male, which is seriously rare in the bird community. During the mating season the females show up to the breeding grounds and it’s a first-come, first, well… come basis. This can get pretty fierce and can even result in physical combat (The Bird Bachelor anyone?). The more experienced a fighter the bird is, the better her chances of landing another male mate. Sounds like these birds might give the term “cougar” a run for the money.

7. Meerkats

Meerkats cooperatively breed, which means that one female–the dominant–who is part of an alpha pair, produces the majority of offspring. If others in the group disobey, they will kill the offspring and cast out the mother. Maybe someone should teach these meerkats some manners.

8. Dingo

“Maybe the dingo ate your baby?” – okay, now that we have that out of the way, this breed of wild Australian dog rule their family groups in alpha pairs. Much like meerkats this alpha couple wants to be the only pair to breed in order to create the ultimate offspring… to the point where they prevent other couples from breeding and, in some instances, have triggered false pregnancies in other females. Coming up next on As the Outback Turns…

9. Ceratoid Anglerfish

By far the most unique situation listed here, male angler fish are born with one purpose: to find a female mate. Male angler fish are much smaller in size than female angler fish and cannot survive for long without finding a female to literally attach themselves to. Once they find a female they bite into her skin and–in a way that the Spice Girls never intended–two become one. He releases an enzyme that causes his mouth to merge with her body (their blood vessels match up–talk about being in sync) and his body atrophies until he’s nothing more than a floating sperm bank. His buddies can get in on the fun too, since multiple males can attach to the same female, all serving as ready mates for whenever she’s ready to spawn.

10. Clown fish

These funny fish live in pairs in a single anemone. Clown fish all want to be the “it” girl–so much so that, although clown fish start out as males, they can change into females. There is a dominant female who leads the school and reproduces, and when she dies the predominant male morphs to fill her position; all of the other fish in the school are neuter until they need to fill one of those two roles.

Article written by Kim Coughlin for Moxy Magazine, March 2011. Image via Forestry Images.